Goodbye My Dear Friends

Tiki Dance and Bumba

Bumba and Tiki Dance enjoying the sofa

I have not been cooking lately.  In fact, I haven’t been doing much of anything these days.  I do not want to be creative; I can barely get out of bed.  My purpose for getting out of bed is gone.  My family, devastated.  On the 18^th of February, I lost two of my best friends in the world, Tiki Dance and Bumba.  I am having a hard time coping these days, which is why there haven’t been updates or new recipes on my blog.  I miss my friends, and I can’t seem to move forward without them. 

     Bumba was a very special dog for us.  When we decided to buy the house we are living in now, the first thing I wanted to do was adopt an old dog from a dog pound.  I found Bumba online through Ulmino, and she seemed perfect.  She was about 13-14 yrs old and had been in a concrete cell for 12 years at the kennel of Rieti, one of the worst and most hopeless dog pounds in the Rome area.  I honestly have no idea how she survived.  At one time this kennel was sequestered because it broke welfare laws and all common decency.  Dog were left exposed to die, to live with dog corpses,  feces, waste and to brave the elements.  Bumba survived this.  We drove up to Rieti on May 1^st of 2010 and took her out of the hell.  And what a gift she was!  Bumba was one of the most spirited souls I have ever known.  She survived hell, and then, within two days of having a home,  it was as if that life never existed for her.  She lived in the now and forgave us.  She was a hurricane, vivacious, loving and patient.  We got only 9 months with her.  And every day of those nine months was a complete joy of life.  When we would take her on walks she galloped as if she were the wind, as if she had channeled Zephyr himself.  She smiled, integrated with our other boys and was friendly with the cats.  I remember when I first saw her photo online.  It was her in a cage, there was shit all over the place, and yet, she was smiling.  That is Bumba.   Bumba, hurricane and life lover.  She was force to be reckoned with.  Whenever we tried to tell her, “no,” her attitude was, “I don’t think so, lady.”  We didn’t want her in bed at first.  She would get in bed and we would try to kick her out.  She would hold fast and not budge until we finally settled for the two inch corner she left for us.  If she wanted something, she took it.  She was a fighter, but also lover.  She was the soul mate of Tiki Dance.

     At the beginning of February, I took all the dogs on a walk around the vineyards.  It was sunny, and Bumba was running like the wind as usual.  When we got home, Ettore and I noticed that she had difficulty breathing, the vet advised us to bring her in.  She never came back.  She developed edema of the heart and lungs and fought for 8 days.  We visited her every day, and she was warm and happy to see us, but her tenacity was no longer there.   Unfortunately she developed lung cancer due to exposure to asbestos in the dog pound.  Apparently very common in dog pounds in Italy.  During those 8 days we still lived our normal lives with our other 3 dogs, Tiki Dance, Chardonnay, and Benny Boo Boo.  Out home felt empty without her, but I think especially for Tiki. 

     Tiki Dance was a very special Yorkshire Terrier we adopted 2 years ago from a horrible situation.  He lived his entire life in a mechanic's garage, was found wandering the Appian Way, “rescued” by a girl who threw him outside on a balcony to brave the elements and to live in his own feces and to live alone.      When we went to take him, he came down the stairs, into the living room and did a tiki dance.  It was love at first site for Ettore.  We took him home, got him groomed, as he was full of dreads and conjunctivitis, and eventually he became the prince of the bed.  Talk about a couch potato!  Tiki Dance lived to be next to us.  He was the sweetest and most vicious dog I have ever known.  He had two personalities, Tiki, the mean growling one and Dance the sweet couch potato that occasionally allowed us to rub his belly.  He had a lot of psychological problems and trust issues.  He wasn’t like any dog I have ever known, he was my brother.  We never treated him like a child.  He was our companion, and sadly, he was just so old when we got him. 

When we brought Bumba home, Tiki Dance fell in love.  Anywhere Bumba went Tiki Dance was by her side.  And being the patient lady that she was, she tolerated him, and I think loved him as well.  It was a glory to see two previously abandoned, neglected and abused souls bond like that. 

     5 days after Bumba went to the hospital, Tiki Dance also started breathing badly.  So, of course, we rushed him to the vet.  At first they thought that he had been poisoned, but his heart valve was destroyed.  He had treatment for one day to ease the pain, and we brought him home on Thursday the 17^th.  He had the worst case of panting I had heard.  I guess I was in denial, I thought he was just sick with a cold or something but he was suffocating.  He came home after the last check with the vet who discovered he had spots all over his lungs, lung cancer.  He came home, we all went to bed and I held him all night.  At 7am, Ettore woke up, and so held him on his chest and Tiki Dance took his last breath at home, not alone, not in a clinic, but with his truest friend, Ettore. 

     The loss of Tiki Dance was shocking, and honestly, I do not understand how the world did not stop with him.  I am having a hard time going outside and seeing that the world goes on, life goes on, but not for us.  Tiki Dance was part of my being.  He wasn’t a pet, but a dear and beloved friend, and I was lucky to get at least 2 years with him. 

     We buried Tiki by 10am, and I had a very strong desire and urge to get over to the vet at once to see Bumba.  She was calling to me, I knew, for some reason that I had to get there, right away.  So we went to the vet, I saw Bumba, I took her out for a small walk, and then we went back into the clinic to have her checked.  When I arrived, I could see she was waiting for me, she was so happy to see us, she wagged her tail, and gave me a soft kiss.  She was exhausted though.  When we took her in for the sonogram, she collapsed.  But before she did that, I called her name to calm her, held her head, she wagged her tail, looked into my eyes, and then the vets took her away to revive her, but she didn’t make it.  I know she was waiting for us to say goodbye.  She fought a good fight, but in the end, the canile lagher won.  However, she had NINE glorious months of happiness, love, family, and freedom.  She changed my life.  Both of them did.  And I can’t believe that within 4 hours I lost 2 members of my family. 

     We are grieving.   I want to hold Tiki again.  I need to know if he was happy, if he knew how much we loved him, that we lived for him, and that without him our family is incomplete.  Tiki Dance and Bumba are buried side by side.  Both of them taught me so much about how to live.  I don’t know any people who have had to endure what they both did, and yet, they survived, lived and lived well when they were finally able to.  I wish I could have a few more minutes with each of them.   I wish Bumba could come home and take over my entire bed.  I want to hear Tiki growl and sneeze because he is desperate for caresses.  I want to enjoy all the idiosyncrasies that made each of them unique, but they are gone, and I cannot cope.  I am not hysterical anymore, I am not in denial, and I know that they are not suffering, but only I am.  I am suffering because I deeply miss them and their friendship and the lessons learned. 

Tiki Dance

     Tiki Dance, rescue boy, thank you so much for being in my life and loving me and Ettore.  You are the brightest star I have ever known.  You were the sunshine in our lives.  You will always be the most unique once in a lifetime friendship and most cherished being I have ever known.  Each day without you seems like an eternity, I think about what I am doing and whether you would enjoy it.  I miss you, I just plain miss you, and I hope that whatever there is on the flip side it is a place of comfort and joy.  Please know that you were loved beyond measure.  Thank you for all of your nuisances, your personality, the lack of fear, your resolve, and your unabashed desire for love.  You took life by the horns, my friend.  I love you so much. 

Bumba

     Bumba, my hurricane, my tornado.  You are missed and loved, and as much as I know your last 9 months were good, I need for you to know that I have never experienced the pure joy of living until I met you.  I always called you my Buddha, because you released yourself from suffering, you taught the power to forgive, to let go, and to be a warrior in life.  Thank you so much for sharing your life with us. 

Tiki Dance and Bumba loved in life and left this world together.  RIP my friends.  You are forever close in our hearts. 

   

I can't emphasize enough the importance of adopting old dogs like Bumba and Tiki Dance.  The time together may be limited, but it is the most rewarding.  Please open your heart and home to an old dog, they deserve their last few months or years with a family.  

Being Neighborly

    I have not been able to post much in recent weeks because of a big change in my life.  I moved to a new house!  With all the packing, organizing, unpacking, painting, lack of kitchen, and new additions to the family, I haven't had much time to breathe, let alone blog about food or wine.  We moved from town to the countryside and it is like night and day in terms of the new lifestyle.  What I lack in convenience (shops, gas station, or a bar), I get so much more from my everyday life than I ever thought possible.
    Instead of the buzzing incessant sound of traffic, ambulances and garbage pick up I have birds.  In fact my next door neighbors have chickens, geese and ducks that are all very busy living out the dramas of their lives.  Instead an alarm clock, I have roosters.  During my afternoon naps I don't wake from the annoying sound of sirens, I wake up to the startling sound of new life.  A mamma bird has nested in the rafters of the roofs right above our bedrooms.  I am thoroughly enjoying the squeaks and peeps of the little ones.  She seems to be very attentive.   My cats are very confused about the situation.  They can hear the birds but they can't see them, so they have spent many wasted hours attacking the walls.  Bless their silly hearts!
     We also have the fortune of amazing neighbors.  The next door neighbors are very friendly with us.  They are restoring their house alone, so it is a long term work in progress.  In just a week we have learned about all the edible plants that are growing wild in our land.  Greens like Chicory, Borage, and Radishes.  We also discovered that this area is overrunning with wild asparagus.  One of the first meals I made was from the bounty of the "hunt."  We spent about an hour gathering edibles around the house and I cooked them up.  I made an amazing penne with wild asparagus, I sauteed it with olive oil, garlic, Celtic salt and some lemon juice.  It was superb. 
     The day after we officially moved in, our neighbors presented us with a welcome-to-the-neighborhood basket.  It contained the harvest of their land and included things like jams, olive oil, and wild asparagus.  One of the jams was cherry which I happened to eat in about a day it was so delicious.  What made it delicious is that it was not overly sweet.  It tasted like cherries not like cherry candy.They have a delightful family.  We noticed that when the kids come home from school in the afternoon they don't just go inside and turn their TV on or play with video games.  They are outside with the parents or hanging out with the geese and chickens.  They are very polite as well...unlike our neighbors before.  We lived in a building of eight apartments.  The neighbors upstairs were constantly fighting and yelling at their kids.  They were also teaching them at a young age to be the next generation of animal abusers.  Every time we would meet in the building they had to make some lame comment about my dogs being disgusting and dirty.  My dogs are far from being dirty.  They smell like fresh rain because they don't eat nasty dog food.  The neighbors below never cracked a smile or said hello.  The man was OCD and had to bleach the elevator anytime we had used it.  So besides being a jerk he wants to cause everyone's cancer from the fumes of chemicals.  But I digress...I no longer have to live in that Eco-monster HURRAY!!  In stead of having 6 animals in a cramped apartment my furry friends run around all day among olive trees, fruit trees and lots of overgrown grass.
    The other great neighbors we have are two houses down from us.   The woman is an American woman from Boston who is a vegetarian and a hippie.  They have over an acre of property.  She lives with her boyfriend who is a gardener.  His gardening philosophy is called Synergistic gardening which is based on the idea that there are no straight lines in nature and therefore there should not be in gardens.  The gardens are typically horseshoe shaped or round and raised above ground.  They are organic as well, and use veganic compost.  They have already invited us to dinner, which is very kind of them.  As soon as I have a kitchen I will return the favor and cook them an amazing vegan meal.  I think I will try to get into their hearts and minds through food.
    I can't emphasize how lovely it is to have neighbors that say hello, that I have something in common with, that don't have televisions, that care about animals and the earth, and that thrive off of producing their own food. 
    When we started this house hunting journey two years ago, I knew that when the right house came to us we would "know."  We must have looked at 15 different different houses all of which had characteristics we liked but most had characteristics that would would not want to deal with down the road.  Kitchens that were the size of an ant hill, a house that was beautiful but next door to an egg factory farm.  I was afraid of cancer from the pollution or becoming a hoarder of liberated hens.Now, two years later, we are in the "right" house and I think we are in a very blissful state.
     When we first started house hunting our main interest was in finding a garden large enough for our puppies and cats.  I promised myself and the powers that be that when we found this house I would go straight to a kennel and adopt an old dog that has been in the shelter for at least 10 years.  I found her!  Her name is Bumba and she is a survivor of hell and for me, she is a living miracle.  She was thrown away in the Canile of Rieti which was formally a Canile Lager, which I have written about in a former post here:
                                             Thousands Linger in Hell

Bumba was thrown in the canile in 1998 and was never taken out again, not even for a walk, until we picked her up on Saturday.  She lived 12 years in a concrete cell day in day out with no break.  She lived in her own waste and survived the period of time when the canile was really nothing more than a death camp for dogs.  She is my living miracle and teacher.  Who else but a dog can live like that and enter into the world without a stain on her personality?  She is so sweet and kind.  She is also very happy and affectionate despite never being socialized.  She plays with her new brothers and is curious about the cats.  The first night she was here she didn't stop walking around the land for about 12 hours.  I think she was overwhelmed.  Today I took her to the vet for a check up, but he couldn't analyze her blood because her ears are severely infected and full of pus.  Who knows how long she has lived like this.
   Our family is complete with her in it.  My new life begins now, a life of sustainable food, gardening, and being neighborly.  I also want to share the bounty of the land come harvest time. I am so grateful to the universe for allowing me the life that suits my family and I.